Let Go
Have you ever had something hold you back from true happiness? Like something was always bothering you. You hated how life was going?
Well my husband felt like this for the longest time, but never expressed his feelings to me. You may be thinking this has something to do with our relationship, but it doesn’t. My husband is a man who made sure I was happy even if he wasn’t. He never brought work home, so I never knew exactly how he felt. Sure, he made comments, but everyone in their lifetime experience some type of drama at work. It got to the point where he couldn’t hide it anymore. He told me all the drama that was happening at work and he couldn’t take it anymore. Some were treated better than others. The ones who were not favored got the extra load, requests always being denied, and they were even short staffed, but the person in charge was not doing anything about it. The turnover rate was so high, but the person in charge did not want to make changes to keep their employees happy. He basically worked at a place that didn’t care about him, so why should he work his ass off while his quality of life was declining? This caused his mental and physical health to shift. He became tired all the time. He didn’t have energy to go to the gym, since he worked his ass off while he was at work. He became unhappy because the way his job made him feel caused him to gain weight. He was in traffic for 3 hours a day and his quality of life was declining. He gave this company everything they needed and wanted for 13 years, but they treated him like he was nobody. He didn’t want to tell me what was going on because we were trying so hard to have a baby. Stress was the last thing he wanted to give me. He also knew that we needed his insurance to cover me since my immune system was weak and my allergies to certain things can cause me to have an anaphylactic reaction. I was also dealing with depression and anxiety at the time that was caused by infertility.
I noticed his shift after we had our egg transfer. We talked about it and the thing I wanted the most was for all of us to be happy. We couldn’t feel free, if something was holding one of us back. We both felt best that he should quit his job. Sure this made me nervous at first, but I was putting God first. We would be able to survive with just my income until he found something. So he put his 2 week notice with no job in place. During the two weeks, he applied to many jobs, but he did not receive any call backs. I applied for insurance at my work place since my insurance will terminate on his last day, but my insurance did not cover spouses. I tried adding him on to see how much would be taken out of my check each pay period. Every paycheck $800 would be taken out so that would be $1600 a month just for insurance for him. He told me not to worry about him. Of course, as his spouse I’ll always worry about him. So I did the next best thing. I researched all the retail companies that had great benefits that covered spouses. The only problem with that, the benefits only applied to full time employees. I wanted to make that sacrifice because my husband has asthma and eczema. So I took on two jobs working full time. My husband hated the idea. He didn’t want me working another job because we were finally pregnant. I did it anyway. I got hired at Ross in Emeryville. My first day was fun. The employees were really nice to me, but time with my family was slim. It wasn’t about the extra income so I didn’t give a shit about making minimum wage. I just wanted my husband to have health insurance so bad.
On his last day at his job, he still hasn’t gotten a call back. I was getting a bit nervous, but I knew it was God’s timing, not mine. When my husband picked me up from work, I put on a happy and relaxed face and asked him how his last day went. Before he could even tell me how his last day went, his phone rang. We both looked at each other. He pulled into a grocery store parking lot to answer the phone. It was Stanford Hospital showing interests in my husbands skills that they offered him an interview. What a coincidence! I know it was God waiting until my husband’s last day to make moves. My husband needed to have a clear mind to ace this interview. It was Thursday when he got the call and his interview was scheduled for the following Monday. He had 3 days to prepare for it. During the 3 days, we went to the mall and he bought a new suit, we practiced day and night since it has been over a decade since his last interview, I was pretending to be the interviewer and I asked him a whole bunch of questions.
After his interview, he waited for a call back. He got the job offer 5 days after his interview. (That was the day I quit Ross.) So far he’s been working there for 2 weeks and I already can see an shift in his attitude. He is more positive, happy, and even has energy to go to the gym! Don’t mind the chappy lips, he bought chap stick.
Before I go on to this next paragraph, I wanted to just mention that my family is the most important thing in my life. When my husband is sad, I’m sad. When he’s happy, I’m happy. If anyone does anything to hurt my family, I will pray for you. So with that being said.
Just so you know. When an employer does a background check on you, you have the right to a copy of the background check. The background check shows everything. It even tells you what your references say about you and what score your reference gives your potential employer. How do I know that? Well my husband requested a copy from the background check company. I wanted to say thank you to the doctors who gave my husband an amazing recommendation. The score they gave my husband were all “Excellent.” I also wanted to say thank you to his “work wives.” Thank you for making my husband feel appreciated at work. He would tell me how you ladies stuck up for him when he was being treated unfairly. I really appreciate all of you. Lastly, to his boss who didn’t give him the best recommendation and actually gave him a couple “poors” as his rating. When my husband saw that, I can see the huge disappointment on his face, which crushed me. He believed he gave the center everything that was needed. He even missed a couple ultrasound appointments because the center was short staffed. You know my husband worked his ass off, but you know what? I forgive you. I wanted to say thank you for not giving him the opportunities he requested. He has received a better opportunity that changed our lives for the better.
I know it sounds so cliche to say, whatever is holding you back, let it go. Things will happen for the better. Just believe and put it out in the universe.
Oh yea, to Ross. Sorry for wasting your time. I had to put my family first. Thank you for the opportunity to work two days, but just an FYI- Where’s my check?
